Punchdrunk Lovesick Singalong

December 8, 2007

Check it out.

http://wordcraftorchestra.wordpress.com/

Filed by tragicallyhip at December 8th, 2007 under General
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May 28, 2007

Gore, Stop Being A Selfish Fuck.

?Ǭ† Only 603 days before the 2008 election, people, look sharp!

For the last months of the goodbye-Bush hype, Gore has pussyfooted around a presidential bid. Sure, he’s said no, but is it really no? It’s like going to a bar and getting turned down by a girl whose rubbing your crotch with one hand and stroking your face with the other. The thing is, Gore needs to run. Gore needs to run because the Democratic party needs a stuffy, rich, white guy. Sure, all this equality for women and blacks is great (it’s super, really.) but it’s not going to win votes. Barack and Hilary are great candidates, as are Edwards, Guiliani and McCain. Are they good enough to push away the mountains of turd and debt that cover the US at the moment? No.?Ǭ† Gore is the eco-friendly, politically responsible and experience, level headed guy that the world needs as president of the United States. Believe me when I say that the world needs it, from the cowering Iraqi children to the pissed-off Russians, goddam it the world needs a Gore.

Do the world a favor, sign these petitions.

http://www.draftgore.com/

http://www.algore.org/

Filed by tragicallyhip at May 28th, 2007 under Politics
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April 7, 2007

Just Bear With Me For A Bit

So the bulk of my time has been eaten up, leaving me with little time to blog. Most of my entries will be done in blursts (2 and 3 at a time)

So just hang tight, because I know you’re all teetering on the edge of your seats for my next entry. You might want to wear shin pads.

I might mess with the theme a wee bit, so feel free to give me some feedback on it. Also, if there’s a subject you want me to cover with my usual senesitivity and charm, just tell me.

Filed by tragicallyhip at April 7th, 2007 under Blogs about Blogging
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March 29, 2007

Sweatshop Labor; Would Somebody Please Think of the Children?

?Ǭ†?Ǭ†?Ǭ† So I have a pair of Nike sneakers, and it seems like whenever the company comes up in conversation, the first thing that the “information” person opposite me says is “Nike? They use sweatshops, you shouldn’t buy their stuff! Little kids made your sneakers and only got paid pennies” Well excuse me, mr. bleeding heart, I had no idea you were in contact with impovershed Asian children. First off, I will not stop buying a brand because they use sweat shops. I’m sure if you went through the wardrobe of one of these caring people, you’ll find that much of it was made by small children in a dirty factory in China. When you ask one of these people what their plan is to stop sweatshops, they respond with “I won’t buy their clothes!” Well that’s just bullshit. You will buy sweatshop clothing. And even if you don’t, $20 isn’t going to bankrupt Nike or Addidas.

But the aspect of this that people always miss is the fact that these kids are starving to death. If you were to force Nike to improve conditions in it’s sweatshop, it would simply move the fucker to North America to save the shipping costs. Then what do the kids do? At least the pennies they were making allowed them to buy something to eat. Fuck you, buddy, I’m buying Nike to support the little Thai kids.

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 29th, 2007 under Current Events, World Events
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THEY TOOK OUR JOBS or: The Pandemic Of Redneck Xenophobia

?Ǭ†?Ǭ†?Ǭ† It began in the Southern US. It soon spread to the entire country, taking control of the political landscape and grabbing immigrants by their green card-laced pockets. It soon spread to Europe and with a rash of events that would bring a tear to a Klansman’s eye.

What problem do people have with immigrants? Sure, they’re illegal, but they’re only illegal because of the government’s strict immigration rules. Not all people have the means to immigrate legally. If these people ever look beyond their illegal status, they see a hardworking foreigner and decide that they’re stealing jobs from hard working people. What they forget to add is that these are hard working people. They are being hired because they work hard for cheap. Why do they work hard? Because they’re dirt poor and are trying to make a live for themselves, just like all of us. Why do they work for less? Because they don’t have the education to get a decent paying job, and all jobs with decent wages with no education required are taken, so they resort to low-pay, off the books work. They also do not pay taxes because they are illegal, so at the root of it, the government is to blame. If these immigrants were legal, they would need to pay taxes, they would have access to schools and would have no advantage to those menial jobs they are “stealing” from hardworking people.

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 29th, 2007 under Current Events, Politics, General
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March 27, 2007

Bill O’Reilly Is A Big Douchebag. (And Ann Coulter Is A Dyke)

I am so sick of these goddam right-wing t.v pundits. Nobody cares about their opinion. Nobody cares about who they think should be burned at the stake or stoned in a public place. If I had my way, all these self-righteous neo-con cash cows would be locked in a room until they cause each other to bleed from the ears. The following is a guide to tell if you or someone you know have what it takes to be a conservative pundit.

1. Do you often complain about illegal immigrants taking jobs from “Hard working people”?

2. Do you often look at a same sex couple and say to yourself “It’d be the end of the world if they married”

3. Do you often refer to the rest of the world as “Un-patriotic” because they don’t fly the American flag?

4. Do you often blame the Iraqi people for getting invaded?

5. Do you often critize liberals for being godless sodomytes?

6. Do you often find yourself telling friends that Jesus will return within the next week, and all your bags are packed?

If you suffer from one or more of these personality defects, you should be removed from a sane environment as soon as possible to avoid contamination (Apply for a job at Fox news immediately.)

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 27th, 2007 under Religion, Politics, Television
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March 19, 2007

I’ll Update Soon!

Seriously I will. It’s been a busy march break.

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 19th, 2007 under Blogs about Blogging
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March 6, 2007

You Got Putin’D!

What happens in Russia, stays in Russia (like your body)

Again with the poisoning! You think the government would have the decency to change up their tactics a little bit. Push them off a cliff, make it look like an accident, whatever, just stop with the poison. I wonder what these did to incur the wrath of an angry Russian president? *cough*dictator*cough* American spies? Outspoken opposers to the Russian government? Really bad tippers? I’m not sure, but I do have some advice for anybody visiting Russia: Do not eat or touch anything.

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 6th, 2007 under Crime, Current Events, World Events, Politics
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March 2, 2007

More American Troops Is Exactly What Iraq Needs (If You’re Going For Genocide)

?Ǭ† Bill O’Reilly is pissing himself with excitement. Bush wants 28 500 more troops in Iraq. Sure, the amount of troops is shocking, but what really miffs me is that Bush can count that high. More troops is exactly what is going to make it worse. There are two ways to “win” the Iraq war:

1. Bomb it until it looks like Dresden in World War II.

2. Either pull out, reduce troop size or strategically move troops to defend Iraqis.

Personally, I’d prefer number 2. If the amount of troops in there right now is not enough, raising troops levels will do nothing. It will serve to get Americans and Iraqis killed.

Filed by tragicallyhip at March 2nd, 2007 under Politics
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February 28, 2007

Fat Kids Are A Burden On Everybody

Link to the story

Well finally. It’s about time somebody took a stand to these fat parents and said “No. Your child can’t have another cake.”

Look at that monster. He looks ready to eat the cameraman. The caption for the picture is “Connor’s family says it has a history of intolerance to fruit & veg.” Intolerance to fruit and vegetables? Oh no! Those terrible fruit and vegetables will get you! The horror of a healthy diet! Not only is this family fat, they’re fat Nazis. They impose their heart-stopping diet on their children until they keel over and die (and probably cause tidal waves in Asia.) So who is to blame for these baby Free Willy’s? Is it…

A) Fast food resturants

B) A non-active lifestyle encouraged by computers and television

C) The parents

If you guessed C, ding ding ding, you’re a fucking winner, pick your prize. It makes me laugh when somebody sues a fast food joint because it made them fat. Well no shit, sherlock. Fatty foods make you fat. It’s not like McDonalds is out to make you fat, what would be the point? If they wanted to make you fat, they’d lose billions. If you get fat, most sensible people have the good sense to go on a diet and stop eating the food that makes you fat, ipsofacto McDonald loses money. It’s supply and demand; if people demand fatty foods, you’re going to supply it. And don’t expect Burger King to tell you that triple Whopper is fat, either. Do smoking companies show people dying of lung cancer? Do drug companies show the side effects in big red font? No, it’s buyer beware, tubby. And you better beware that your arteries don’t clog.

Filed by tragicallyhip at February 28th, 2007 under Health
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